Proud To Call Them His Children

What’s the greatest lesson that Matt, a single man in his 50’s, has gained through the journey of adoption? Adoptive children are simply children who long to live a normal life, to feel loved, and to be accepted for who they are and what they are capable of achieving. For Matt, adoption was something he had thought about for years but had not pursued it for fear that his family would not be accepting of his life-changing decision. Then, in 2005, when his father was diagnosed with terminal cancer, he expressed to Matt that he was disappointed that he never married or had children of his own because he knew Matt would be a great father. It was then that Matt decided to tell his father that he had been thinking about adoption but never followed up with it. At that point, Matt’s terminally ill father made him promise that if adoption was something he saw in his future, he should go for it. His father passed away that December and the next January, Matt began the classes to become certified as an adoptive parent. The adoption preparation classes were both eye-opening and inspirational for Matt, who began to truly believe that becoming an adoptive parent was something he was meant to do. He explored numerous adoption websites and countless child profiles, then turned to Adopt America Network for assistance in finding a child who would be a match for him. This step of the journey was the toughest and took nearly three years.

In the fall of 2008, Matt was matched with Garry and Bradley, who were 14 and 8 at the time. When the visits started in January 2009, Garry and Bradley had been in the foster care system for nearly five years. From the very first visit, Matt thought that spending time with Garry and Bradley just felt right. They did, however, face many challenges in the beginning. Both Garry and Bradley were very attached to their foster family. In February 2009, the boys went to live with Matt; since it was in the middle of the school year, Garry and Bradley were not looking forward to moving and having to start a new school, especially since Garry was involved in basketball and had a girlfriend. Another challenge that Matt and the boys were faced with was the snags of the adoption bureaucracy, turning the normal six month trial period into nearly a year. It was all worth the wait and in February 2010, the adoption was finalized. Matt says he feels “incredibly blessed to be Garry and Bradley’s dad.” Even with the extra laundry, a not-so-neat house, and having to fix dinner every night for three, he wouldn’t change anything because he knows he has extra love to give to Garry and Bradley and he feels their love in return.

Overall they have adjusted well to their new home environment, new family members, and a new school. Garry and Bradley have both made friends and have become actively involved in school, sports, and church activities. Matt says other caregivers and Garry and Bradley’s teachers often tell him that the boys are remarkable young men, especially considering what they have endured in their lives. And, as their adoptive father, Matt is proud to call them his children.